The Curse of a Godless Man…
“The curse of a godless man can sound more pleasant in God’s ears than the Hallelujah of the pious” (Bonhoeffer, Life Together).
“When I write that my own situation in those months of pain and decision can be described as prayer, I do not only recall that during that time I sometimes read the Psalms and they became my psalms, or that, as I have also mentioned, I occasionally cried ‘Jesus’ and that name was my prayer, but I mean that I also at times would shout ‘Fuck!’ and that was no obscenity, but a most earnest prayerful utterance” (William Stringfellow, A Second Birthday).
“Barth did not want merely to preach to his audience (in the prison). In order to preach to them properly he also wanted to get to know them personally, and so he often went to visit them in their cells. For instance, he once reported that ‘this morning I listened at length to three murderers, two confidence tricksters and one adulterer, added the odd remark here and there and gave each a fat cigar.’ On another occasion he asked in amazement, ‘Am I really something of an optimist or a walking embodiment of the heresy of the restoration of all things? I found it impossible to be despondent or disturbed over these men. Instead, I thought that I had seen something encouraging and cheering in each of them’” (Busch, Barth, p. 415).
I was talking with friends last night over some wine as the sun set. I said I feel very connected to people who do not consider themselves Christians, aren’t church-goers, and may not believe in God at all. I get the impression that some of these people I feel connected to are more in the game than those who assume they are playing center field.
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William Stringfellow articulated in his two separate prayers what is probably in most people’s (believers and non-believers alike, if in fact a distinction should be made at all) hearts.
I wonder if most of us who show up at regular religious services are disconnected from our hearts and therefore cannot fathom uttering words of honesty from the core of our beings. It may be an unknown place for most of us and since we are fearful of what we do not know, we shrink back and begin the process of immersing ourselves in becoming the religious and pious us.
I have noticed that when people gather together, we are at times quick to offer our opinions, quote a scripture verse or a line from our latest read. It also seems that many of us react to life and to others through our past experiences and somewhat damaged emotions.
I have found that when we are disconnected from our hearts, from the real us, we are unable to be authentic and to honestly relate to others and to God. When the seemingly negative things rise to the top of our hearts, we shove them bad back down and deal silently with our disappointment, shame and guilt. When the potential of life and wonderful dreams break through like specks of light into darkness, we close the gaps so we will avoid disappointment. What remains is a religious expression where we read our prayers to God and converse with others from the script we have heard so often in our religious circles. The heart lies dormant.
I just arrived home to the Maritimes a matter of hours ago from a weekend in Memphis. I still have images of riches and poverty; black and white; comfort and fear. I spent time with a group of men (some believers) who’s conversation mostly surrounded missions, denominations and business…kind of nice, but not all that meaningful nor memorable.
My significant personal encounter was with a young black hip-hop artist from Memphis who was selling his wears…his band’s CD for a few bucks. We talked, I purchased a CD and he gave me a typical southern “God bless you”. I felt I connected with this individual on at least some level. The CD’s lyrics closely echo Stringfellow’s second prayer. I was reluctant to give the CD to my seventeen year old son upon my return home - I did anyway and he was thrilled with it.
The hip-hop guy, as well as the other men I spent time with may or may not be in the game and may or may not ever see center field. I wonder at times if I am in the game or even in the stadium. What I do know, is that I too, appreciate the realness and enjoy the connection with many of the people I meet who seemingly do not even know that a game exists.
Thanks Kari. Well said.
Hey Dave,
The Bonhoeffer quote reminds me of a similarly stated one from one of the great novels To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee. The context is a kind, no-nonsense neighbour of the protagonist trying to explain what “foot-washers” are, which in the novel, are the religious, legalistic, condemning crew who live nearby. And she says: “Sometimes the Bible in the hand of one man is worse than a whiskey bottle in the hand of - oh, of your father.” And then: “What I meant was, if Atticus Finch (the protagonist’s father) drank until he was drunk, he wouldn’t be as hard as some men are at their best.”
This always speaks to me, because it’s so true. And try to imagine trying to explain that whole mess, religious hypocricy and what’s “right” instead, to a class full of 15 year olds, most of whom have little context for church or religion or anything. Yikes! But I still throw it out there and see who catches it, knowing most won’t understand, and that I will often never know who did.
I’ve know many people who are better drunk.