nakedpastor

“God has yet to bless anyone except where they actually are, and if we faithlessly discard situation after situation, moment after moment, as not being ‘right’, we will simply have no place to receive his kingdom into our life. For those situations and moments ARE our life” (Dallas Willard).

“When Christ calls a man, he bids him come and die” (Bonhoeffer).

Karen Armstrong, in her very captivating book, The Spiral Staircase: My Climb Out of Darkness, says:
“In the words of the late Joseph Campbell, we have to ‘follow our bliss’, find something that wholly involves and enthralls us, even if it seems hopelessly unfashionable and unproductive, and throw ourselves into this, heart and soul.”

For me, to follow my bliss means to be a pastor. In fact, I desire to be the best possible pastor I can be. About two years ago, when I was in the middle of great vocational confusion, someone asked me what I wanted to do with the rest of my life (Don’t laugh! Yes, I was 48 at the time!). I couldn’t give a straight answer. With insightful wisdom he asked me, “What do you want people to say about you at your funeral?” Suddenly there was great clarity. I knew that I didn’t want people to say, “He was a great artist!” or “He was a great musician!” or “He was a great carpenter!” or whatever. I knew I wanted people to remember me as a great pastor who served the church well.

Lisa continues to encourage me: “Pursue your passion!” It is serving as a pastor. And when I was reading a book on business success, he was writing about doing what you are passionate about. I caught myself thinking, not about art, selling on ebay, blogging, or any other kind of business. I realized I was thinking about how to be a good pastor. That was another day I realized what my passion was… how to follow my bliss. I love art, music, business, and the intellectual life, but my core passion is the church and being a pastor of it.

Are you following your bliss?

“Nothing depresses me more than hearing an organized religion worry about membership. Do they think Jesus is somehow impressed by voter turnout? Do they think God gives preference to religions that appear especially popular? It’s not like God only allocates federal funding to religious organizations that meet a quota…” (Chuck Klosterman).

I will sub-title this “Rainy Days and Mondays Always Get Me Down!” Pretty consistently, Mondays are a terrible day for me. As a pastor, it is usually my day off. I get up early, as usual, read my devotions, some theology, and try to pray. I do a bit of blogging and eBay. I get my kids up, prepare lunches and get them off to school. Then, I promptly proceed to sink into a deep hole of despair while Lisa and I have breakfast before she goes to work. People suggest many reasons why this may be true:

1. demonic attack: I just delivered a mighty blow against the enemy forces on Sunday, and Satan counter-attacks on Monday.
2. pride: I delivered a fantastic sermon on Sunday, and no one seemed to notice.
3. shame: I delivered a crappy sermon on Sunday, and everyone seemed to notice.
4. hopelessness: I look forward to a whole week of pushing against an immoveable object (the church).
5. boredom: I have to spend the whole day with myself because no one else will.
6. sexual frustration: I am available all day for sex while Lisa’s not.
7. adrenalin withdrawal: Purely psychosomatic: I was a awash in adrenalin on Sunday and I have none left for Monday.
8. ego-starvation: No one’s around to tell me how wonderful a pastor I am.
9. disappointment: My blog, ebay and offerings stats sank into the troughs on the weekend.
10. revelation: The fact is I’m always depressed, and Monday is the only day I have to slow down enough to realize it.
11. denial: The possibility that there is no god and that I’m involved in an elaborate hoax, gnaws at my conscience.

Okay… either tell me which one you think is right, or add another one.

“Unfortunately, in life, our strengths can become our weaknesses. Just as the dark side of charisma is narcissism, the dark side of innovation is fraud. Enron fell victim to both” (Sherron Watkins).