gay and the art of coming out

"The Art of Coming Out" by nakedpastor David Hayward

“The Art of Coming Out” by nakedpastor David Hayward

This is the proof copy of my fourth book, The Art of Coming Out. It will be released soon! You can see my other books HERE.

I’m very excited about this. I didn’t realize, until I started counting, that I have over 100 cartoons that advocate for the LGBTQ community. So I’ve collected them into a book!

There are 3 chapters:

  1. The Discrimination: This chapter’s cartoons depict how the LGBTQ community experiences discrimination.
  2. The Struggle: These portray the struggle the LGBTQ community is engaged in for recognition, rights, etc.
  3. The Affirmation: The happiest, these show how good life can be when we all accept one another.

I’m very happy with it.

The Art of Coming Out will be released as soon as the digital version is ready. Hopefully soon!

The digital version of The Liberation of Sophia is underway as well.

Hey why don’t you join our online community The Lasting Supper. It is a safe place to talk about your sexuality. We are great listeners!

My art, cartoons, and Sophia drawings are all available HERE. Check them out.


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32 Responses

  1. J says:

    “3. The Affirmation: The happiest, these show how good life can be when we all accept one another.”

    Boy that’s a can of worms waiting to me opened right there. Ok here goes..I’m all for equal rights under the law. And I’m all for live and let live. So why does it seem (to me at least just being honest here) that in order for “us all to accept one another” it’s only acceptable if a huge huge sect compromises their sincerely held moral convictions first? ie, that isn’t very “accepting” of the other side either.

  2. Cecilia Davidson says:

    J, as one who identifies as queer, kindly fuck off.

  3. Is it possible to view homosexuality as a deviation but still accept the homosexual? Apparently not.

  4. Jarred H says:

    Dittoing what Cecilia said.

  5. dwaters says:

    We’re all part of the whole. To not “accept” a part is to deny part of your self and that’s just not healthy.

  6. J says:

    Yep. Truth is still a real bitch. Good luck with your cause, err, agenda with such crass closed mindedness. Tell me, do you all enjoy shutting down honest open dialog or are you afraid of it?

  7. J says:

    In my view, your welcome to your own convictions. In your view I’m not. Got it.

  8. Jarred H says:

    J, experience has taught me that the “honest open dialogue” you’re alluding to is none of those things.

  9. Cecilia Davidson says:

    Yes, truth is a bitch and here’s the truth, J –

    You came into this with an asshole mentality hoping to further condemn and judge based on your beliefs. To which, I ask that you kindly fuck off.

  10. J says:

    Cecillia, actually I came into this with no delusions of the sensitivty of the subject. And I apologize for putting off that vibe, and I apologize for my “truth is a bitch” comment. I guess my cyber skin still needs thickening, and I reacted inappropriately, sorry.

  11. J says:

    Honestly, I’d really just like to know.

    How do the words of Jesus in Matthew 19 make him a “good teacher,” while those same words make me a bigot that needs to go “fuck off?”

  12. Jarred H says:

    Have you read this book?–Christians-Debate-ebook/dp/B0076DFG5S/

    How about this one?

    This one?

    Have you read any books like them?

    Have you even read this one?

    Really read them? Read them to actually understand them as opposed to just find where they’re wrong?

    I’m guessing you haven’t. So why should I or anyone else here believe you actually want to have an honest and open dialog, let alone understand?

  13. J says:

    I’m just looking for an honest answer to an honest question.


    Believe what you want. Live as you want with whomever you want. Love whomever you choose to love. And yes! The state has no right to deny same sex couples the same rights and privileges it does to heterosexual couples. Change that.

    But it won’t change the words of Jesus in Matthew 19. And I guess I’ll keep waiting for that honest answer to an honest question.

  14. As long as we are ruled by the bible we will never be ruled by love. We will live with conditioned minds and conditioned behaviors, and as a result have insiders and outsiders. Our divided mind is what perceives and projects division in the world. Until we this separation in our own minds, we will always be looking for proof texts to support our fractured thought and heart.

  15. Jarred H says:

    J: You want an answer? Then go do the reading and prove that you are honestly able and willing to listen to it. We do not have to jump on your demand, and the fact that you expect us to is inherently hostile.

  16. Jarred H says:

    I also find this statement interesting:

    “The state has no right to deny same sex couples the same rights and privileges it does to heterosexual couples. Change that.”

    You admit that the state has no right to deny us our rights and privileges, but you tell us to “change that” as if you have no obligation to aid in changing that injustice yourself. Doesn’t the Bible also call for you to advocate for and seek to counter injustices done against others as well?

  17. J says:

    Like I’ve said, I’m all for equal rights under the law. Lady Justice is supposed to be blind for a reason. But not even the SCOTUS will cause me to compromise my own personal convictions. Those convictions will not cause me to think any less of someone else (whether you believe that or not). Nevertheless. Those same convictions make me “hostile” and bigoted in yours. Honestly I don’t get it. And this has been the only point I’ve tried to convey. And again, my apologies for not being very good at it.

  18. Jarred H says:

    Really? You’re all for it? So you actively speak out against those religious and political groups that would deny us our rights? You write your state and national legislators urging them to support non-discrimination laws? You vote in favor of such legal writes when you have the opportunity?

    I think that your convictions are bigoted because they actively harm LGBT people. If you bothered to read some or all of the books I recommended, you would read about some of the examples of the harm that those convictions have caused.

    You don’t “get it” because you have put no effort into trying to “get it.” And yet, you seem to think that’s somehow our fault or our problem to solve.

  19. Jarred H says:

    By the way, which is it? Were you trying to “convey a point” or were you trying to engage in “open honest dialogue”? Because you accused us of not being interested in the latter. Yet if you’re not really looking to have a complicated and nuanced dialogue that requires you to sincerely listen, think, and wrestle with things so much as you’re looking to “convey a point”…..

    Because, trust me, I’ve heard that same point dozens of times before. I don’t need you to convey it to me once again. I suspect everyone else can say the same, too.

  20. J says:

    I’m not suggesting anything is anyone’s fault. Just honestly hoping. Yes hoping, as my original post pointed out….can everyone on both sides of this subject truly accept one another? I like to think that I’m respectful of your views and convictions. But I know full well there’s obviously plenty I’m missing here. And I appreciate your responses.

    I just haven’t been able to sense the same acceptance of my convictions from you as you clearly don’t seem to sense and acceptance from me. I guess I just have no idea how else to put it.

    I’ll never personally know what kind of strength it obviously takes to come out. But I grew up with a personal friend who’s son has. So I’m not completely oblivious to it. It’s clearly something we all need to better learn how to accept and communicate with each other about.

    That’s all I’ve hoped to do here.

  21. Jarred h says:

    If you really want to learn, you’ll go do the reading. Otherwise, your “hope” is just a bunch of words. That’s the bottom line.

  22. J says:

    Your bitterness will never help you here or any where.

  23. Jarred H says:

    And I’m done. You have proven that you did not come here with honest intent to understand. Merely to push your ideas and play the martyr. Nothing good can come from further conversing with you.

  24. Jarred H says:

    Also to anyone else following along, note the accusation of bitterness. That is often used by certain Christian groups as an attempt to manipulate.

    I mean, heaven forbid I express my feelings about the years of harmed I and others have faced and the caution that I have learned to take in order to prevent further harm. It’s perfectly reasonable for someone “trying to understand” and who swears “he wouldn’t treat me any differently” to merely write all that off as “bitterness.” In bizarro world, maybe.

  25. J says:

    Feeling so accepted.


  26. J, given how you’re citing Matthew 19, I must ask in which context you are quoting an entire chapter.

  27. Jarred H says:

    If “accepting” you means I can’t call out your harmful and manipulative behaviors, then you’re absolutely right that you will find no acceptance from me.

  28. Jarred H says:

    Cecilia, there’s a couple things interesting about the use of that chapter:

    1. In that same chapter, Jesus also admits that it would be better for people to remain unmarried “for the sake of the kingdom of heaven.” This is a sentiment that Paul repeats in one of his letters. Granted, both Paul and Jesus acknowledge that not everyone can really do that and offers an “out.” But it’s still notable that they both say this, and yet you won’t hear many people in the evangelical world pushing young heterosexuals to pursue lifelong celibacy and singleness. I doubt you’ll ever see an evangelical take a young bride or groom aside and ask them if maybe they should reconsider and “try just a little harder” to remain celibate, as both Jesus and Paul say is best.

    2. Later in the chapter, Jesus commands tells a rich man seeking to get into heaven that he must sell all of his worldly possessions and give all the money to the poor. Again, this is a calling that you are unlikely to find an evangelical embrace and emulate so literally. And yet, this theme of giving up everything to help those in need is a common theme throughout the New Testament.

    Interesting how for many evangelicals, the “hard truths” that are so important and need to be constantly emphasized are the ones that are “hard” for someone else to follow, isn’t it?

  29. I find it peculiar that when J is confronted with their outright hateful approach towards non-heterosexuality (and likely the idea/existence of transexuality), they go for the tired and common “I’m just wanting to get answers” rather than explaining themselves, for the hiding behind bible verses that have their own contexts rather than saying “I find anal and oral sex disgusting”

  30. Steve Flower says:

    I’m always astonished at how any gay-affirming publication, speech or message automagically becomes a forum for religious folk to stomp their feet and insist that their way is the only way. And then there is such shock when GLBT folks respond with hostility – even though that is what they have frequently known from conservative religion.

  31. Steve, I’m not quite sure I follow. It may just be my brain being tired.

  32. No surprise Steve hasn’t clarified. Kinda wish they did so I could figure out what they were trying to say.