when it’s time to let things go

sophia release art drawing by nakedpastor david hayward
Sophia: “Release”

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I want to share with you one drawing and its accompanying meditation.


There’s an expression I’ve heard: “Let it go… like a balloon… let it go!”

There’s another expression that if you love something you should release them, and if they return they love you too.

There’s another expression that if you give up family and friends that many more will be added to you.

I’ve had to release many things. I can’t even count. Some have returned. Some have not. Some have been added. Some will not.

But I released everything.

It is so difficult to let things go. It is difficult to let friends go. Your loved ones. Your pet. Your job. Your house. Your church. Your religion. Your faith. Your gods. So many things. It is difficult to let things go.

But I discovered there are more difficult thing to let go. Anger. Fear. Resentments. Griefs. Disappointments. Goals. Desire.

I am letting something go. It is important.
You’ve caught me here releasing my hurts.
My pain.
My sufferings.

I’m not denying them. I am, somehow, grateful for them. But I will not allow them to define me or determine me any longer. I’ve gone through so much. I have suffered so many things. For so long I allowed my pain and my hurts to tell me who I am. For so long I allowed myself to wear the tortured soul persona. Constantly wrestling!

No longer.

I am better for my sufferings,
but I am better than my sufferings.

Like this balloon, I am releasing my suffering. I am releasing my pain. I am releasing my disappointments. I am releasing my hurt. They have helped shape me. But their purpose has been served. They may be discarded. I release them.

Thank you. You may go!

I bears my wounds.
I bear them well.
I bear myself well.

There are 58 more of these!

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3 Replies to “when it’s time to let things go”

  1. May I offer that when a person ‘let’s it go’, and if the “it” was a fuel-force in their life, then they drift like a small boat without gasoline in the overboard engine.

    The sense of vacuum can be overwhelming in its hollowness. We seem to crave fuel for our ‘boat’s motivation-engine’.

    By analogy, I was part of the Evangelical fleet of boats.

    Over the years, I have observed the bulk of the Evangelical fleet drift – and then in desperation for some greater motivation, change fuels – from the open-arms gasoline of evangelism meetings, to the super-sparks of charismatic gifts, to the sluggish-diesel of homogenized Biblical theology, to the stuttering-and-sparkle fuel of Christian music, to the nitro-flamed-fuel of hating gays, and now to the turbo-charged hatred of illegal aliens at home and Muslims overseas.

    We were so desperate for a better fuel than God’s love….. why?- I am not completely sure of the answer to this day.

    It seems that we, the Evangelicals, were not willing to accept the gentle fuel of love.

    Perhaps the love-fuel was too calm, too patient, too willing to listen to our enemies, and too willing to help our enemies unconditionally like the ‘Good Samaritan’ helped the wounded man.

    Perhaps the love-fuel was too gentle towards other faiths and beliefs, and too willing to work alongside of them for the greater good of God’s kingdom. Perhaps the love-fuel combined with the abundance of the fleet’s boats just did not let a person ‘stand out’ and ‘race ahead’ in competition.

    Perhaps the love-fuel simply did not give enough distinction to any captain, and therefore something else was needed to become the outspoken lead-tugboat that the other boats would follow without thinking, without fuel… simply being towed on long twisted doctrine-ropes until the lead boat burned out its own engine, caught on fire, and sank.

    I recall how we even tried to call our exotic fuels ‘love’ by redefining the word ‘love’ into ‘speaking the truth’, ‘being bold’, ‘not tolerating evil’, and ‘winning back the nation for God’…. but these were all cheap marketing ploys and advertisement jingles….

    It seems that our need for exotic fuel had replaced the need for love.

    As I said earlier, I was part of the Evangelical fleet of boats. I have let them go.

    And, I have let the need for exotic fuels go… but the difficulty has been becoming satisfied with the love-fuel.

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