Jesus and Bernie: Caption This Cartoon Contest!

"Jesus and Bernie: Caption This!" cartoon by nakedpastor David Hayward

“Jesus and Bernie: Caption This!” cartoon by nakedpastor David Hayward

WOOT It’s time for another Caption This Contest!

Provide a caption for this cartoon. I call this one “Jesus and Bernie”. So let’s come up with some imaginative and funny captions. I know you can do it. You’ve never failed me yet.

The winner gets a fine art reproduction print of the completed cartoon, signed, sealed, and delivered to their door! A joint effort between the nakedpastor and the winner! I’ll sign it then you can sign it once you get it. Something you can hang up and brag about.


1. Leave a comment here on my blog with your caption. (ONE ENTRY ONLY PLEASE!)
2. Sign up for my emails where you get my cartoons in your inbox every day! (If you do, you also get a free e-book, Two Sizes Too Small… a book about our journey towards spiritual independence.)

I’ll post the winner this weekend with the completed cartoon with the new caption.

Have fun!


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63 Responses

  1. Brenton says:

    I’ve not found such great faith even in the GOP.

  2. Autumn says:

    Time to start name dropping, Bern. Use mine.

  3. Steve Calvert says:

    Hey Bernie, you do realize being a socialist Jewish can get you killed.

  4. Piet de Groot says:

    Not everything is lost. Trust me. Been there.

  5. David Waters says:

    They’ll crucify you Bernie.

  6. Nola Reading says:

    socialism runs in families

  7. Gary says:

    Hey Bernie, Socialism doesn’t work on Earth silly…only in Heaven.

  8. terri jo says:

    Thanks for jumping in, Bern….. We needed to spice it up, what with all the anointed ones. Shalom, Bra

  9. David Klingeman says:

    I’m really not His son!

  10. Jeff Robinson says:

    Don’t become Christian, be like me.

  11. JC says:

    “Some friendly advice—don’t ride into DC a week before Election Day and chase Congress out of session with a whip….”

  12. Terry Heaton says:

    Fear not. Just pretend they’re all naked and sitting on toilets!

  13. Kris799 says:

    Your loss will be the people’s loss. They will get it eventually.

  14. Yes Bernie I am telling everyone on the other side the same messages. Don’t spin it, don’t spin it, keeping it real.

  15. Shannon Mullen says:

    It’s not whether you win or lose, it’s how you play the game.

  16. Jeremiah Rivera says:

    “Don’t worry, pal; Sodom and Gomorrah aren’t the only cities that feel the burn.”

  17. Angel Rivero says:

    I’ve been “Feeling the Bern” since the foundation of the world.

  18. Chris Curzon says:

    “Did you hear the one about Donald Trump and the Samaritan…?”

  19. Ellen Haroutunian says:

    ::Brooklyn accent:: “I am sick and tired of the tithes going to the top tenth of 1% of church leaders for their second homes.”

  20. Alex says:

    If you don’t win, I’m moving to Canada.

  21. Jim says:

    You aren’t the only chosen one. I just won’t say what you are chosen for yet.

  22. Matt says:

    So remind me: how exactly did you get all these young, liberal people to embrace the idea of a Jewish savior? Asking for a friend.

  23. Timothy says:

    When that bird came down on your podium, you should have said that the bird’s message was: “This is my beloved son in whom I am well pleased.

  24. Kirk Moore says:

    Let the one without sin cast the first stone

  25. KatR says:

    Charlotte, Daniel, Olivia, Josephine, Ana, Dylan, Madeline, Catherine, Chase, Jesse, James, Grace, Emilie, Jack, Noah, Caroline, Jessica, Avielle, Benjamin, Alison.

  26. “You’re gonna get crucified.”

  27. John Stevens says:

    “I can’t hear what that Trump fellow is saying, can you?”

  28. Don’t worry man, the system screwed me too.

  29. Deborah says:

    “It was me”

  30. Steve G. says:

    Keep up the good work.

  31. Carol Wimmer says:

    Thank you (from one Jew to another)

  32. James Smith says:

    Thank you for being a witness.

  33. J says:

    Hillary will give you a BJ if you bow out…

  34. Dug says:

    “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.” (Matthew 5:6)

  35. Jody Weitzman says:

    Hail Hydra

  36. Kevin says:

    Hey Bernie, you’re forgetting the most important thing. Repent and believe in me.

  37. Lisa Chism says:

    Be careful conservatives crucified me

  38. James says:

    I think you’re awesome, which explains a lot huh?

  39. Albert Garlando says:

    Bernie, Bernie, Trump has asked to sift you like a Mexican bean. But I have prayed for you, Bernie, that your faith may not fail.

  40. David William Edwards says:

    There’s more to changing the world than a single election.

  41. Ernest Marton says:

    Eventually Bernie your followers forget everything you are about and become an exclusiveright wing majority that seeks to co trol everyone else and will forget what you were all about. Sigh…

  42. Preety says:

    If you mess with mammon, you get the crown of thorns.

  43. Rod says:

    Remind me, Hillary who…..?

  44. Nick Gypps says:

    Can you get me the Pope’s autograph? I’m a massive fan!

  45. David says:

    No, I won’t give you the delegates if you fall down and worship me

  46. Connie Winch says:

    “Whatever you do, don’t tell ’em I told you to run!”

  47. James Phillips says:

    “Being a socialist Jew can have dire consequences.”

  48. Steve Simms says:

    Bernie, don’t teach people to look to the government for answers, teach them to look to Me!

  49. Karen says:

    “When you see the bird land on your podium, act surprised.”

  50. Ann says:

    May the best woman win.

  51. Michael Lonergan says:

    Dude! They didn’t believe me either…

  52. Velour says:

    A little bird told me you’re a real mensch.

  53. Kate Hammerquist says:

    Shhh…I’m not ready to make this public, yet. But, you’ve got MY vote, Bernie.

  54. DM Mitch says:

    “Don’t worry Bernie. You can beat Trump. I have it on good authority the apocalypse isn’t happening this election year”

  55. klowden says:

    Thanks Bernie,
    keep up the good work!

  56. Greg says:

    Good fun isnt it? Push them any further and dont be concerned. Theres a table prepared up here by JFK MLK Gandhi John Lennon. Good food too! All in the presence of your enemies. Theyve saved you a seat. ☺

  57. Matt says:

    Hey Bernie, I’m actually a capitalist…

  58. “I originally wanted to call it the ‘The Sermon on Vermont’, but the place hadn’t been colonised back then”

  59. Alex: You’re the winner with “If you don’t win I’m moving to Canada!” Maybe my Canadian heritage influenced my decision, but I did find this one the most humorous and theologically and politically clever. After all, Bernie does seem Canadian to me in many respects.

    I’ll need your mailing address Alex so I can send you a print of the finished cartoon which I’m posting today. Email me at haywardart at gmail dot com!

    To all subscribers to my newsletter… I’m sending you a link to download a high-quality image of the winning cartoon so you can print it out or use it as a screen saver or whatever you want.

    Thanks for playing everyone.

  60. Terry says:

    Hey Bernie,
    The US kingdom doesn’t work, try mine!

  61. Cheri says:

    Forgive them Bernie, they know not what they do.

  62. DAVID FREEMAN says:

    There is no such thing as a “Free Lunch” except from me….

  63. drmrs says:

    Tell the Jews that you are Jewish. Tell the Christians that Jesus was Jewish. Tell the other religions that the Chosen People will not judge them until after the Presidential election!