Love in Confusing Times

Love in Confusing Times

"Love in Confusing Times" cartoon by nakedpastor David Hayward


This is another post addressing the distressing issue of deconstructing while married.

Yes, all these posts can apply to any relationships.

But I'm particularly addressing marriage because I see a lot of marriages suffer when deconstruction hits one or both partners.

I want to help marriages survive this‚ if they should and if they can.

I'm talking about when one or both start questioning their beliefs,
or feel like they are losing their faith,
and experience their relationship to the church undergo change,
it affects the marriage.

Once you were on the same page.
Now you wonder if you're even in the same book.
Or library!

When Lisa and I got married many years ago, we thought we really knew each other.

Whoa, were we in for a big surprise!
Because, slowly but surely a vast and horizonless vista opened up before us,
inviting us into a never-ending exploration of each other.
But, this was like a leisurely float down a lazy river in a nice canoe.

Then deconstruction hit.
Then us.

This felt like the floor disappeared from beneath our feet,
hurling us deep down into a fathomless ravine.

But that's where we rediscovered,
and renewed our love for one another.

It was the climax where the most significant theme of our love story was to really get to know each other,
learn more about each other,
and fall more deeply in love with each other.

Yes, we were walking through the valley of the shadows.
But we were doing it together.

We would do it again.
And probably will.

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