upside down perspective

I had a dream last night:

A huge storm has come through and totally destroyed my house. I had in the past put up sandbags to protect our house. And up to now they have worked. But this time the storm was so powerful that the sandbags were swept away. There's nothing I can do. Even though we have coped previous storms, this one was simply too much. I have to rely on insurance.

I wake up realizing that sometimes I drastically underestimate the ramifications of me leaving the church last year. Even though it was wise and healthy for me to leave the professional clergy and I'm glad I did it, it has also been a cataclysmic transition. It has been like a violent storm. It has totally turned my world upside down, and there are many days when I just don't feel like I have my balance. My own ingenuity will no longer suffice. I am going to have to trust. I have to trust that everything will be okay. I have to trust that this will be taken care of.