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This drawing is inspired by the Ouroboros Snake... of the snake eating its own tail.
What came first? The chicken or the egg? What came first? The thug or the theology? I read Tony Jones' thoughts on Mark Driscoll.
Jones has always admired Driscoll, maybe envies him a little, wants the best for him, believes he can be redeemed, and suggests that things can be restored.
What I found most interesting though is that Jones believes the problem with Driscoll is theological.
That is, did Driscoll become the focus of concern because of his theology? Or was it because of his behavior?
I'm concerned that Jones' post reflects the refusal of the church to understand spiritual abuse. It neglects the pathology of its abusive leaders. I don't think this is being fair to the victims or the perpetrators of spiritual abuse. People are victims of not just a bad theology, but a pathological cruelty.
I don't think Driscoll's theology made this happen. Driscoll "embraced" his toxic version of theology because it aligned with his moral compass. It fit his personality. It worked for him to achieve his goals. Then it manifested the worst in him. Then he continued to develop his toxic theology in order to make more room for his pathological behavior. Mars Hill Church too.
Jones' sentence, "It could have happened to any of us." is true, because I believe we all participate in this dynamic. Theology is our creation. It is a reflection of our drives and desires.
Then, not satisfied to only be the product of our drives and desires, it also becomes the producer of them. Theology is a vicious cycle of our desperate need to understand and control our universe.
Step into this cycle at any point and you can see that we are both the root and fruit of our theology and pathology.
And yes, it spins out of control by manifesting itself in toxic, controlling, and abusive behavior. Nothing can be done about bad theology because of free thought and speech.
But we can do something when this manifests itself in bad behavior. Cruel theology is a nuisance. Cruel behavior is unacceptable.
When Driscoll thinks bully to his people, we can say please stop. But when he actually bullies people, we can step in and say you will stop now!
I don't think this is a theological issue. I think it is a pathological one. Not just for Driscoll and Jones, but for the entire church.
If we would be healed, our theology would take care of itself.
1080 comments
Jen,
‘the guilt trips about abandoning my"purpose" or “mission”.’
NAILED IT! (TOO!)
Yeah, the desire for a purpose was what got me involved. I desperately needed something structured to recover from a difficult pervious experience.
And then I felt really guilty when I had recovered, and grown, and the purpose became constricting, rather than liberating.
Thanks Brad. I’ll be reading that.
Why did I become involved? There was a lot of good with the bad. I thought I could manage the toxicity. I thought I could keep my distance. But as soon as I started to really struggle, I became an easy target, who couldn’t push back.
NAILED IT! And that is one reason it was so hard to leave. That and the guilt trips about abandoning my"purpose" or “mission”.
@Tim (October 3, 2014 at 6:55 pm). Dood! no worries … plus any time I can share my five-year-old friend’s definition of evil, makes it all worth it …
Communicating face to face is hard enough. Take away tone of voice, body language, facial expressions, and wowzers … lots harder. But I appreciate greatly that people here are trying, and sticking with it. Rock.On.
Mike Clawson/Alex,
Thanks for being a part of this conversation.
Everyone who offers their story, adds to the wider narrative, and shines light on things that have been shoved into the dark for far too long.
I respect you both:
Alex, for being transparent: for handling your concerns about source confidentiality in a way that worked for you, your source, and for us; and
Mike for your clear explanation of your part in the events, and your engagement with Julie in a spirit of reconciliation.
Please feel welcome to stick around, if you’d like.