BUY THIS CARTOON IN MY NAKEDPASTOR SHOP ON ETSY! I grew up in Christian circles that valued self-hatred. They didn’t always call it that. They called it things like… self-denial, crucifying the self, dying daily,self-sacrifice,beating yourself into submission, ego-less, humility, contrition, repentance, self-awareness. It’s taken me years to realize believing in myself is healthy and nothing to…
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(50% OFF all my paintings. Go HERE and use coupon “VALENTINE19” at checkout! Much love you guys!) Making a healthy choice for yourself is always good. Though others may not interpret it as healthy. But if you take steps to take care of yourself, to expand your experience of freedom,…
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In fact, I think all deconstruction hits you hard. I’ve known some people who revert back to before deconstruction started to set in full force. It was too scary so they retreated. They pretend not to know the truth from then on. It’s too hard! Because, it’s not easy changing…
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Refugees are brave. Desperate and brave. If you’re a spiritual refugee, you’re brave too. Desperate and brave. You didn’t choose the isolation you’re experiencing. Yes, you’ve changed your beliefs and/or left the church. But you didn’t ask for the loneliness. But it certainly is a result of your choices. You…
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Relationships in general and marriages in particular struggle to survive deconstruction. In a marriage, when one or both partners change their beliefs, it puts incredible strain on the relationship. I hate to say it, but my observation is most marriages don’t survive it. Marriage is about change. If you don’t…
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If the news over the last two years has taught us anything at all, it’s that political corruption is intentional. It’s not an accident. The packaging claims they are appointed to serve their constituents. But, the packaging has been ripped off and we now know that’s not true. Politicians are…
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WHAT I MEAN BY SPIRITUAL INDEPENDENCE I remember the response when I first used the term “spiritual independence” several years ago. There was a lot of confusion and even outrage: “Christians are supposed to be in fellowship, not by themselves!” “We’re not supposed to do it alone!” “We can’t trust…
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Just because we can’t see your wounds doesn’t mean they’re not real. Many people have no idea how traumatizing changing your beliefs can be. Many people have no idea how agonizing leaving the church can be. Many people have no idea how wounding spiritual abuse is either. When someone asks…
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Because I’ve experienced it, and because I’ve observed it in the lives of so many people I’ve helped through this painful process, I’ve concluded that loneliness is the greatest issue people face when they deconstruct and/or leave the church. Loneliness sucks! There’s an obscure verse that is always used by…
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