This cartoon about the pain of losing church friends is titled Holy Ghosted. I love the humor in the name but for many of us, being ghosted by a community we were so invested in and loved is no laughing matter.
It does hurt.
Wow, do I have some stories! Okay, I'll tell you one. I planted a church for a big-time international ministry. When the leader who hired me to plant the church decided he didn't like me anymore, he fired me. The next Sunday I had to go to the church when it was opened in order to pick up some things I'd left there. People were already gathered. Seriously... when I walked in, up the aisle, gathered my things, and walked back out, not a person said a thing to me. They never even looked at me. It literally felt like I was a ghost. And, well, to them I was. In fact, I was a demonic one apparently. Literally ghosted.
It's happened many other times too by people I genuinely thought were lifelong friends. So strange! Weird. But, ghost stories are weird.
It’s Okay to Feel This Way
Being ghosted by church friends when we leave the church is a tough experience. When connections we thought were strong suddenly disappear, it leaves us feeling hurt and confused which only magnifies our feelings of religious trauma.
I’ve had my share of these moments, and they’ve made me question my place and worth. But they’ve also taught me about resilience and finding genuine connections.
If you’ve been ghosted, know that you’re not alone. Share your story in the comments, and let’s support each other through these challenges.
1 comment
Oh yeah, that is totally familiar, and I was the pastor. I didn’t even get invited to a major anniversary of the church that happened a few years later.