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If you like The NakedJournal, you'll enjoy my weekly newsletter about deconstruction, freedom, and life in general.
We all unravel our beliefs in our own way. That's why I champion spiritualĀ independence. Focus on being yourself and find your own path.
A man on a couch depressed. His wife on the phone: āSorry, he canāt come to the phone right now. Heās losing his religion.ā
Deconstruction usually starts in the mind, often initiated by trauma: an event that provokes doubt. It can be as simple as questioning the Bible, or the loss of a loved one that makes you question a caring God, or frustrating experiences in the Church or with religious people. A Doubt Virus lodges in your fevered brain that spreads, overtaking your certainty. Confusion sets in.
When youāre immersed in a religious culture but start questioning it, you experience withdrawal and grief. You may feel a mixture of sadness at the prospect of loss and elation at the hope of freedom. Confusion creates stress that you feel in our body. Youāre stuck between sadness and joy, conflict and peace, control and freedom. You count the cost of taking the next step because the risk feels high.
Youāve become suspicious about submitting to authority and believing ideas unquestionably. You know youāre in for a bumpy ride as you contemplate breaking away from the Church, its leaders, and your peer group (family and friends), all of whom perpetually monitor you. You know if you take a stand for your spiritual independence you may find yourself all alone. Your social life will change.
But have hope!
Because I know you will progress beyond confusion to peace of mind.
You will finally feel authentically you, happy and free.
And youāll learn how to navigate your present relationships and form new and healthier ones.