Tony Jones on Mark Driscoll: What came first, the thug or the theology?

Tony Jones on Mark Driscoll: What came first, the thug or the theology?

This drawing is inspired by the Ouroboros Snake... of the snake eating its own tail. 

chicken or the egg cartoon nakedpastor david hayward

What came first? The chicken or the egg? What came first? The thug or the theology? I read Tony Jones' thoughts on Mark Driscoll.

Jones has always admired Driscoll, maybe envies him a little, wants the best for him, believes he can be redeemed, and suggests that things can be restored.

What I found most interesting though is that Jones believes the problem with Driscoll is theological.

  • He titles his post is "Thoughts about Mark Driscoll"
  • He talks about the "heady" days of publishing and speaking.
  • He dismisses his disturbing personality traits by his use of the word "sure".
  • He says it isn't a moral issue (evil) but that he is passionate.
  • He says more than once that Driscoll is "extremely smart" or "brilliant".
  • He suggests that he will "see" (as in "think"?) his way out of this.
  • He writes that Driscoll has just embraced a toxic version of theology.
  • He hopes that Driscoll will turn away from this toxic theology.
  • He concludes therefore that Driscoll is not the problem, but his theology.

But my question is‚ What came first? The thug or the theology?

That is, did Driscoll become the focus of concern because of his theology? Or was it because of his behavior?

I'm concerned that Jones' post reflects the refusal of the church to understand spiritual abuse. It neglects the pathology of its abusive leaders. I don't think this is being fair to the victims or the perpetrators of spiritual abuse. People are victims of not just a bad theology, but a pathological cruelty.

I don't think Driscoll's theology made this happen. Driscoll "embraced" his toxic version of theology because it aligned with his moral compass. It fit his personality. It worked for him to achieve his goals. Then it manifested the worst in him. Then he continued to develop his toxic theology in order to make more room for his pathological behavior. Mars Hill Church too.

Jones' sentence, "It could have happened to any of us." is true, because I believe we all participate in this dynamic. Theology is our creation. It is a reflection of our drives and desires.

Then, not satisfied to only be the product of our drives and desires, it also becomes the producer of them. Theology is a vicious cycle of our desperate need to understand and control our universe.

Step into this cycle at any point and you can see that we are both the root and fruit of our theology and pathology.

And yes, it spins out of control by manifesting itself in toxic, controlling, and abusive behavior. Nothing can be done about bad theology because of free thought and speech.

But we can do something when this manifests itself in bad behavior. Cruel theology is a nuisance. Cruel behavior is unacceptable.

When Driscoll thinks bully to his people, we can say please stop. But when he actually bullies people, we can step in and say you will stop now!

I don't think this is a theological issue. I think it is a pathological one. Not just for Driscoll and Jones, but for the entire church.

If we would be healed, our theology would take care of itself. 

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1079 comments

I think one of the most important aspects of this entire thread is that, while some argue that a blog is an unsuitable forum for such a conversation to take place, the silenced are thrilled that they have finally found a venue that gets their voices out there. And their voices aren’t just heard, but they are actually changes things. It reminds me of Wall St., where those in authority resented the fact that their precious street was littered with hippies, radicals, and homemade protest signs.

Conversation is happening. Even if there are heart-wrenching stories, strong disagreements, uncomfortable corrections, and even strong rebukes, the dialog is progressing and getting somewhere. There is some resolutions, respects, recants, and reconciliations. I think this is remarkable.

And no official oversight committee is in charge controlling what the outcomes will be.

Who said the blog isn’t appropriate? Where is that rule written down?

The fact remains… marginalized voices are being heard. Things are changing.

So, maybe a blog IS a suitable place after all.

David Hayward

Claire: This is common behavior, not only in the church, but all organizations. The leader’s personal success and reputation is very tied in with the organization’s. It’s like a car manufacturer overlooking faults in a car so that they won’t get embarrassed or go broke because of a massive recall. It’s the same thing. I think that often there isn’t malicious intent involved, just that they are so consumed and obsessed with the success of the perceived good impact they are having on the world that any kind of setback would be seen as unfortunate.

David Hayward

Hi, Claire

How about, “That’s exactly what you would say if your were trying to control me, isn’t it?”

Followed quickly by, “Goodbye.”

kate willette

@Claire said: “Does anyone know if there are certain personality types that are more prone to narcissistic behavior? And the types that are more susceptible to fall for it?”

I’ve got some thoughts on the second question. Actually, that issue of “what makes me [or anyone] susceptible to being taken in by abusive people?” comes up all the time in spiritual abuse survivor communities. It’s the core issue behind questions like, “How do smart people fall for tricks like that?” and “I don’t know why she’s picked me to pick on” and “Why did this happen to me?” Very legitimate question – and one that it seems like is common to wrestle with in an abuse recovery process.

In thinking through the years about what made myself and others susceptible to being taken in by spiritually abusive leaders, I’ve concluded that it could be anything. There is no formula or one-tactic-fits-all. But I think the main working principle is that each of us has vulnerabilities — both good things and bad things in our life – that can be exploited by someone who has no scruples. So, their “best practices” end up as our worst nightmares.

Do you have a strong desire to know the “truth” or believe that doctrinal knowledge is what gets you close to God? Some bully pastors can provide a complete system where it’s all spelled out for you, no major work on your part required … just listen to them and say what they say, do what they say, be what they say. Desire for “family” or a “father figure”? They’ve got a charismatic figurehead father, plus a covenant plan to keep you in their clan for your whole lifetime. Are you highly relational, or may emotionally starved, and susceptible to “love bombing”? They’ll pour on attention until you’re hooked — and then they give you nothing, or maybe dangle attention in front of you just often enough to keep you linked in, or maybe even switch over to negative conditioning/guilt to keep you on the line. Do you have a higher need for structure and discipline, especially if you’ve spent much of your life in chaos? Some can provide regimentation to the max, just what you [think you] “need.” Or are you susceptible to “guilt bombing” because you’ve been trained by “negative conditioning” to respond to demands that you perform, give, serve, learn this, don’t do that, you must say this, you can’t be that, keep off the internet, don’t gossip about leaders … or else! Do you need for supposed freedom after years spent in bondage? They’ll provide a space where anything goes!

Also, researchers on “cults” and “totalist institutions” that control people distinguish between tactics that are used for recruitment to get you to join, and retention to keep you there. They aren’t necessarily the same, and again, what works to attract some people in is what eventually repulses other people out.

Anyway, we all have blind spots, genuine needs, and legitimate spiritual aspirations that create vulnerabilities that people of neither conscience nor compassion will seek to leverage to their own advantage. And what our particular vulnerabilities are almost doesn’t matter — predators always find ways to lure in their prey. So, if their tactics don’t work on you, they likely will still work on others.

A book you might find helpful to think through the kinds of personalities that seem to be particularly prone to bullying others is: Emotional Vampires: Dealing with People Who Drain You Dry.

http://www.amazon.com/Emotional-Vampires-Dealing-Revised-Expanded/dp/0071790950/

And as you continue your journey, and maybe consider journaling, this article may give you some helpful thoughts and questions to think through what’s happened to you and reflect on insights about what to do next:

http://futuristguy.wordpress.com/2013/04/21/is-it-time-to-tell-my-story/

brad/futuristguy

Thanks everyone.
The thing that really raises my blood pressure is that if I said “It seems like you’re threatening us” “it seems like you’re shaming us” “It seems like you’re trying to control us” I can already hear and see the response of “I’m so sorry you feel that way, I certainly never wanted to communicate those things…..blah blah blah.” And then it would turn around to “you’re judging me, you’re bitter, you had a hard childhood, you’re projecting….etc.” How do you deal with that? It’s utterly maddening, especially coming from a pastor.

claire

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